Familiar Murmurs

In the beginning, there was only one language.  But progressively, the external English-filled world brought division, and I found myself losing touch with my mother tongue.  I sat by the ebony table etched with abalone cranes eating wedges of apples and Jeju mandarins, zoning out to quiet conversations among my relatives---soft murmurs and occasional words I could recognize.  Years later, I find myself in the modern day living room, in calls with people from all over the world.  Today, I hear the melodic words of my Thai friends and cannot understand a single word although the sounds have become familiar.  The worries of the day dissipate; everything feels meditative, and little do my friends know how much their presence means to me, and how it brings me back to my childhood. 

Happiness is...

things that remind you to feel deeply and stay reflective...

Dialogue and Inner Monologues

 This is just to say (hey there W.C.Williams!)

Moments from shows and things make me curious about what is in everyone's headspace, and then I end up contacting those who matter at that particular moment in what I feel may be a small inching tiptoe towards some sort of character development---if only a semblance of some mental stretching to reach out and link thought fingers (hmmm...) with others. (<--this is junky and long, but just gonna leave it here to commemorate my 4am brain fart.) Anyhoo, today I thought about all those people with whom I bounced ideas and was thankful. This is kinda personal garbledegook, but then again, everything is. 

Must stay dry

Dust particles in the sunlight through the redwood trees:

the driest fluidity you ever did see. Surrounded by the liminal,

I become an object of projection---a voice, the semblance of presence---

ever tiptoeing around the you's I've created too.  In constant rewind to a state of acquaintance, we meet 

again and again captured in a sunbeam passing through digital trees. 

Transports

 You move a pillow away from the windows for fear the cold air might make it shiver. You keep your shabby toys together with the new; the faded little lion might be lonely.  The petals from a rose--you keep them in a little book until they are translucent--the beautiful now coursing through the fragile lacy veins. Empathy for the inanimate! How we decorate our paths with these emotive stones!

위하여

 

a little nervous and unsure: an ep album of a collection of me's over time comes out tomorrow.  i dont know what will come of it or if it will mean i can write new songs again, but am appreciative of all the things that inspire(d) me, even if for a fleeting second of a day.  wish i could hold onto the white lights i think of lining the streets--the fireflies of the cities--when i feel this way.  wish i could take the cobalt skies of concert nights in california and keep them in my mind's eye a little longer...

In the middle of June

 

29 degrees, a normal Sunday full of lazy goodness, oversized yellow Haruko Haruhara t-shirts and definitely, 5 minute pauses between sentences as brain pathways bump and collide. All thoughts are instantly wiped out by the blue outside my window. words. the moment you feel you are about to discover something about a particular combination of words--some sort of clarity in the nebula of all things--Ah! so close...

And here for some garbledegook, because after much thought, it is, and forever will be, a jumble: 

youth's conversational cadences, (what about them, and what about the you's in them), hearing the voice of the ideal in everything, equilibrium cleanse (so it happened just now), retracing steps to the emotional doors to reopen,  should really plant this basil. 28 degrees, a little damp on a normal Sunday, (come on, be a little less normal), glad to be able to have a full day of meaningless marination.